Y'all ain't getting a "One Century Post" cause I'm definitely not going to make it that long. If only, lol.

But yeah. It's crazy to think that the last time I was on this site posting any news was.... nearly ten years ago. A little less but I'm not counting. As I said on my last post.... "I DO WHAT I WANT". Or something like that. Not sure.

I've lurked, and yeah, this site has definitely changed a good bit, and in some ways it hasn't I guess. I sorta miss the old look of the site, but that's the nostalgia talking.

So looking back ten years... there's a ton I wish I did better with, and there's a lot I'm grateful for. Unfortunately, I've decided to post an update right during a really terrible point in my life. So for some good bits: Weed is legal so I don't feel like ass for smoking, and I definitely smoke a lot more often. *Takes another drag from my pipe*

I've gained, lost, and gained lovers, and so Valentines day didn't feel like shit. That being said, any of you who want to go "oh don't be mad over it it's just a day lol"... most of you who say things like that either have someone in your life already, or you don't give a fuck about having someone. For those of you who have that privilege? Awesome! But do shut up, please? Yeah, people bitching doesn't always help the mood, but neither does seeing everyone being all lovey dovey when you're stuck alone and wanting people. So yeah. But ranting aside... actually... let's address why this update seems a bit negative. It's not sarcasm, I assure you. Well, not entirely.

Two words: Fuck cancer. Not for me though, but for my mom. She's in hospice; the cancer is no longer responding to treatment, it's causing her stomach to form blockages to the point that any further treatment for either issue will just kill her quicker, so.... it's just a matter of making her comfortable. To be fair, we all have a timer ticking down that we don't really know when it's up, but when you're told you have "weeks to months" to live, that timer suddenly starts ticking down really fucking loudly, and it definitely overwhelms anything else you got going on. I'm grateful that she's doing pretty well so far though. She's holding down solid food and not having blockages right now, so with luck, she'll be going out to dinner in 4 days.

Honestly, there are two things I'm really upset over: my mom wanted to live to 100, if only to see the world in a century. The good, the bad, she just wanted to witness it. That's pretty awesome. Except she's not going to be able to do that. And the second thing? I wanted her to ring that fucking bell in the doctor's office. They have a bell for patients to ring when they finish treatment and beat cancer. It's a simple, silly, stupid thing, but it means so much.

Combine that with another friend of mine telling me they have stage 4 cancer, and their ongoing treatment is just to slow progression and prolong his life. He's tired all the time. Again: fuck cancer.

On a more positive note... Depression, Anxiety, and ADHD is no longer ruining my life. Thank you, medication. I've been getting more and more productive lately, and I've gotten back into music! Doing music with my partner and solo, getting back into art stuff, and hopefully I'll resume working on some other projects of mine!

Will I be more active here? I don't know. Will I lurk more? Dunno. Will I post again in <insert number> years from now? Perhaps!

Until next time!